Say What?

I hope everyone had a relaxing Thanksgiving. 

Mine was great--ate a bunch of turkey, lots of leftovers, fun with family, learned Paul Walker died :(, ate three slices of pumpkin pie in his honor, watched Catching Fire, ate more left overs....and now, I never want to look at another turkey for at least twelve more months-blah! 

Remember Give-Away below! I have received some awesome pictures, and I can't wait to see more. 

This was submitted by Terry Feinberg who used to be the CEO of the Tri-County Apartment Association(Bay area, CA). He also used to write a housing column for the San Jose Mercury News, and this was his favorite article with real quotes and his own commentary added in. 

The police tell of excuses people have used to avoid speeding tickets.

Insurance companies tell funny stories people have used to explain accidents.

I have some gems rental housing owners have received from tenants over the

years.

''The garage was too dirty, so I had to rebuild my motorcycle engine in

the living room.'' (Give the guy points for honesty, but still use the security

deposit to replace the carpet.)

''The toilet seat is cracked, where do I stand?'' (Perhaps if she used the

toilet seat for its intended purpose, it might not have cracked in the first

place.)

''Our lavatory seat is broken in half and is now in three pieces.'' (A

variation on a theme, but we really do need to improve the education

system in California.)

''I know it's my fault, but who's going to pay for it?'' (This would be

funny if it wasn't so pathetic.)

''I am writing on behalf of my sink, which is running away from the

wall.'' (If only the wall had paid more attention.)

''I've had a little problem and will pay my rent as soon as I get out of

jail.'' (Did you check references on this guy?)

''I request your permission to remove my drawers in the kitchen.'' (At

least he didn't ask the owner to help.)

''The toilet is blocked and we cannot bathe the children until it is

cleared.'' (Should you send a plumber, or call Child Protective Services?)

''This is to let you know there is a smell coming from the man next

door.'' (I wouldn't touch that one with a 10-foot pole.)

''I punched a hole in the wall to make sure there was no

asbestos.'' (Now that's creative.)

''Will you please send someone to mend our cracked sidewalk.

Yesterday my wife tripped on it and is now pregnant.'' (Perhaps if he had

helped her get up instead.)

''Our kitchen floor is very damp, we have two children and would like a

third, so will you please send someone to do something about it.'' (Have you

suggested they take a walk down the sidewalk?)

''Could you please send someone to fix our bath tap. My wife got her

toe stuck in it and it is very uncomfortable for us.'' (And how exactly did she

do that?)

''When the workmen were here they put their tools in my wife's new

drawers and made a mess. Please send men with clean tools to finish the job

and keep my wife happy.'' (I'm not making this up!)

OK, time to turn the tables. Here's one from a rental owner to a prominent

attorney:

''How long does it take for a 3-day notice.'' (Would you believe 27 days less

than a 30-day notice?)

Thanks Terry!