I Ain't Payin My Rent

>> Thursday, October 30, 2014

This story comes from a friend.

She manages a 157 unit complex. For over a month they were getting hit hard by a graffiti artists.
Someone was tagging up the laundry rooms, all the a/c boxes, picnic tables etc.
The problem got so bad that her owner, who is also an attorney, wrote a letter to ALL tenants asking for their help in finding out who the culprit was.
He also threatened that any tenant caught defacing the property would be evicted, no exceptions.

The following day the manager found a note in her rent box that read...

"Dear (managers name spelled terribly wrong, but in this person's defense, she has a common name spelled with two silent letters in it),

I ain't paying no rent this month because you are a racist. Threatening to evict us cuz of our graffiti is *&^%$&-up and illegal. Just so you know it is gonna get a lot worse."

Then they signed it, with their first name, last name and apartment number.

Hmmmmm.

Not sure how the eviction of someone defacing private property is racist.
I'm also wondering if this tenant knew he was writing a letter of confession.







Regardless, he was served the eviction papers that day.














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Fire Alarm Checks

>> Tuesday, October 14, 2014


Preforming fire alarm tests in each unit serves two purposes.
One) To make sure the alarm works, obviously.
Two) To check out what condition the apartment is in, obviously.

Going door-to-door, stepping over tenants dirty clothes, and getting on my tip-toes, using the end of a pencil to push a button, only to be deafen by a LOUD ear piecing beep--is not my idea of fun.
But, what I discover during my checks is almost always worth the ringing I hear in my ears for the next two days.

---
I was nearing my last apartment.
I knocked on the door, twice, hard.
No one answered.
I cracked the door, made my presence known, loudly, before I stepped in.
I closed the door behind me, and walked over to the fire alarm.
As I reaching up, a cat appeared from the hallway and curled himself around my leg.

I called the tenant.

Me: "I see you have a cat."
Tenant: "I don't have a cat."

Fact: I am not blind. 
---

I came to a door and there posted was a note from the tenant that read

"You do NOT have my permission to enter this apartment. My fire alarm works great. DO NOT ENTER."

I gave more than twenty-four hour notice, and I was legally allowed to enter.
I walked in.
I figured this tenant must be a bachelor as all he had in his apartment was a bed, a desk with a large TV, and a chair.
Well that, and about two months worth of fast food wrappers scattered across his floor.
It appeared that he didn't own a trashcan.
I stepped through the trash and into the hallway where his fire alarm was supposed to be.
It was missing.
I then spotted it on the counter.
I picked it up, and noticed that he had removed the batteries.

I replaced the batteries, and then left him a note on his door saying that he needed to clean up his apartment.

Kinda hard for the fire alarm to work when it doesn't have batteries.






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The Staged Apartment

>> Thursday, October 2, 2014


I had a tenant who was a bit odd.
He would sit at the picnic table in the middle of the courtyard and stare into my apartment all day.
Kinda creeped me out.
He looked like he never showered, shaved, changed his clothes or ate.
He would retreat back to his apartment at sundown, return at sunrise, and sit there.

But he payed his rent.

As one would imagine, I was quite pleased when he turned in his 30-Day notice along with his rent.
Around 11:58 p.m., the night before the last day of the month, I get a call on the emergency line.
This tenant said he would need an extra day to get all his stuff out of the apartment.
Side note: This is NOT an emergency.

A day later than planned, he turned in his keys.
He said he was able to get everything out of the apartment.
He did not want to do a move-out inspection, nor did he have a forwarding address.
He said he would call me with this information when he figured it out.
Side note: I always send the reconciliation to the apartment if I don't have a forwarding address, because the post office may have one, and then I can't be accused of not sending out the deposit. But you probably already knew this.

Moving on.

I entered the apartment and, it was clean.
And not just clean, but immaculate.
It was also filled with his brand new furniture.
It was as if he staged the apartment before he left.
No clothes left behind.
Cabinets stocked with new dishes.
The refrigerator empty, and looked to have never been used, and I swear he sprayed air freshener before he left.
It was so bizarre.
I am used to finding destroyed apartments, this was so the opposite, that I found myself getting a little weirded out.
As if I were the subject of some hidden camera prank.


I tried calling him.
Several times.
He never returned my call.

As nice as the apartment was, I have to lug his furniture out of the there and store it for the required amount of the time.
Side note: That was annoying.
Upon clearing out the apartment, we found a drawer filled with sauce packets from a variety of different fast food restaurants.
Ketchup, hot sauce, soy sauce, tempura sauce, honey mustard....you name it, he had it.

I, of course, threw it all out, and stored all his brand new Ikea furniture in the garage.
I mean, sauce packets don't hold value, they are free.

I finally got a call several weeks later.
It was the creepy tenant.
He said, in a super casual way, "I think I may have left a few things behind in the apartment."

Uh, yeah.

When he showed up to collect his belonging, he had no interest in the furniture, dishes or fridge.
He didn't even care about the check with the remaining deposit owed to him.
He was, of course, looking for his sauce collection.
And he was quite upset when he found out that I had thrown them away.




I mean, it is rather annoying when you run out of soy sauce.

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The Sad Ceiling Fan

>> Thursday, September 25, 2014

This is the saddest, and grossest, ceiling fan that I have ever seen. 
This was submitted by Sinead G. 

"I am an Assistant Community Manager of a 432 unit property and loving every day of this insane career.

This resident had gone home for the summer (student) and called the day before returning to ask maintenance to turn on his a/c... so it would be nice and cold when he arrived.(side note: You are a very nice manager) 

The maintenance team quickly opened and closed the door to call a hazmat team. All of the photos were taken by the hazmat team, I can't claim them! There was a pinhole leak in a hot water pipe. He was downstairs, so the water and heat of the summer created this masterpiece of a property management nightmare. Our maintenance team informed us (months later) that his photo is now used as the beginning slide of the "Mold Remediation" course PowerPoint they attend annually."



Thanks for sharing Sinead G. 

Now, I've seen black mold, but I can't say that I've seen the gold and reddish beads before. 
It looks looks rather festive. 
In a barfy kind of way. 

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