>> Thursday, February 5, 2015
>> Thursday, December 4, 2014
"Another one for the book."
I used to say that all the time.
Like when this happened and this.
Truth is though, I already wrote the book.
Took me two years to write the darn thing.
Writing out so many words is kinda hard.
And the publishing world is kinda tricky.
Rough stuff I tell ya.
The book is a comedy about an apartment manager, and I'll have more information for you soon.
Like after I have yet another kid.
Birthing has become a sort of a hobby of mine.
But methinks you'll like it, the book not the birthing part, so look for more information next year.
Anyways, moving on, here is "another one for the book."
Perhaps the sequel?
I had a tenant who was late on his rent every. single. month.
He would come to my office on rent day with puppy dog eyes, and a twenty-minute speech as to why he can not pay rent right now, but he was good for it.
He didn't work, but was in involved in a court case that he swore would result in a large payout for him.
He was suing a former employer or former girlfriend or former doctor...whoever it was, it was former.
And every month, he swore that this was the month that the judgment was going to finally go in his favor(despite many, many, many appeals on this case that he had lost some years back).
He always ended up paying his rent, just in small inqriments throughout the month.
It was annoying, but he was a long time resident, so it sort of became the normal.
Finally, I sat down with him and pointed out the fact that he could not afford his apartment, and that it may be time to look into other options.
We left the conversation with him agreeing that paying over a thousand dollars a month in rent, when you have zero income, was perhaps not the most finacially responsible decision.
He thanked me for me input, and said he now knew what he had to do.
Fast forward two days later.
This tenant is at my door all smiles and giggles with a check for the full amount owed.
Shocked, I took the check and asked him where he got the money.
Did he now have a job?
Did he win his court case against his former something?
He said that he had contacted a very nice man who was willing to loan him the money for rent.
All he had to do in return, was pay the nice man back double the amount loaned within thirty-days.
Lucky for this tenant, we ended up evicting him shortly after for non-payment.
I say lucky, because about three days after the new tenant moved into his old apartment, that "nice man" came back with a baseball bat, some of his friends, and took everything of value in order to pay back the debt.
Now, I clearly remember suggesting he look into moving to a less expensive apartment that, you know, he could afford.
I do not recall mentioning the words LOAN SHARK.
>> Tuesday, November 18, 2014
Once upon a time, there were two stores tucked away in a beautiful shopping center located in a desirable Southern California city.
One of the stores catered to those looking for a cold sugary treat.
The other store catered to those who were looking to enhance their appearance.
The owner of the cold sugary treat store went by the name Sprinkle(for the purpose of this blog only).
The owner of the enhancing beautification store went by Perm(see parethesis above)
Now Perm, who had resided in her store for quite some time, was not happy when Sprinkle moved in.
It annoyed her that Sprinkle's customers would stand and eat in front of her store, even if some of Sprinkle's customers were Perm's customers as well.
Sprinkle did not like Perm, because she would yell at his customers when they would eat in front of her store.
The poor shopping center manager, let's call her Patience, had the pleasure of recieving weekly, sometimes daily, complaints from Perm about Sprinkle, and from Sprinkle about Perm.
Not happy with Patience. Perm decided to take matters into her own hands.
She stopped paying the rent until Patience agreed to kick-out Sprinkle and his prosperous business that brought many new customers to the shopping center.
Which makes perfect sense, because if you want someone ELSE to get kicked-out, not paying YOUR rent is the fastest way to make that happen.
When Perm was served court papers, she realized that her approach, while genius, was not going to work in this situation.
So, naturally, she did what any sane person would do next.
She peed in Sprinkle's mailslot.
How Perm accomplished this is a technicality that Patience doesn't want to know.