Dear Perspective Vendors,

>> Thursday, February 25, 2010

If you want to become a vendor at this fine rather large property let me give you a few examples of what to do and what not to do.

First off don't call me and ask if you can fax over your information to get on my vendor list.
Do you want to see my vendor list...


Yep that flyer of yours with the nice big Clip Art man painting a house is sitting right in there with the Cancun Vacations and Viagra Flyers(honestly am I the only one that gets fax spam??)


If you are really wanting me to consider using you for your painting/glazing/maintenance/carpet installing skills, it is NO,T and I repeat NOT, a good idea to ambush me as I walk out of Home Depot. I am a little skeptical, and jitterish, so I assume any strange man approaching me is a rapist and needs a spritz of pepper spray.
Consider yourself warned.

However, putting forth the effort to come to my office and make a personal appearance, is always a good idea.
But offering a 20 something mother of two, a $2.00 oversize mesh trucker hat with your company logo so tastelessly plastered on the front, is probably not going to land you the account. I am just saying, wtf am I going to do with that?

You can, however, give me a pen. I love pens. I keep an eye on nice pens like I do my children. I have been known to chase after someone with a stabler who "accidentally" walked off with my pen.

But, honestly, at the end of the day,  it all comes down to price, because I obviously don't want to pay more money than I am already paying. But, I do love when you tell me that you can not beat my current vendors price, because you offer a more high end product.
Come on!
Honestly!?
This is an apartment complex, not a Ritz. If it works okay, and it's cheap, it looks good. If it works okay, and it's cheaper, it's looks better.

So, if you happen to work your way into my heartless body and become a vendor I must warn you that I do have one very important rule. That rule is, that I deal with enough whining/attitudes/stupidity/slobness already so the second you whine about something, give me even the hint of attitude, or get in one of my maintenance men's faces....

*Good Bye!


Sincerely,
ME


*however lavish gift baskets or gift cards will get you back on my vendor list.


3 comments:

Margaret February 26, 2010 at 2:43 PM  

Gotta love venders. I deal with some of them and they totally drive me nuts!

Anonymous February 26, 2010 at 5:41 PM  

How about the ones who somehow con you out of your first name, and talk to you as if your long lost friends?
This one sticks hard in my craw. "Hey, Herb, hows it going"? For a millisecond, you stand there holding the phone and wondering--WHO? Then it dawns on you.
I offer them the number of our central office, and they take it, but I doubt they ever call there.
I deal with Maintenance USA, and it urks me a little when the account manager for me calls immediately and confirms my faxed order, using my name and asking about my Grandson, Mason. (She wriggled that out of me in an earlier phone call) That really jerks my jeans!!! Sometimes someone will call and ask the Model and Serial Number of my copy machine. These are the "toner pirates". With only that information, they ship you a case of toner and bill you for it. You can watch them with a caller ID that says "Out of Area" call. Let the answer machine take the call, they won't leave any messages I assure you!!
People are unbelievable!!

Herb Spencer
Lincoln Terrace

Unknown February 28, 2010 at 3:46 AM  

I have a pen problem. I've chased and screamed at people who took my pens.

 
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