The Parking Lot is a Dangerous Place

I was walking around the parking lot when I noticed a stucco pillars in one of the carports was damaged.

A large chunk of the stucco was missing and the floor was also sprinkled with stucco dust.

I moved further into the carport and inspected the car parked there.

The front bumper was cracked, scratched and had cream colored speckles that just so happened to match the pillar.

Now, I ain’t no detective mind you, but I was fairly certain that this here damaged car I was staring at had run into that there pillar.

I grabbed my phone and called the tenant.

Tenant: Hello

Me: Hi, I’m calling about the pillar in your carport that you ran into.

Tenant: I didn’t run into anything.

Me: Was someone else driving your car?

Tenant: No

Me: I’m standing in your carport and the damage on your car matches the damage on the pillar. I’ll have the maintenance staff give you an estimate on the damage.

Tenant: I didn’t run into anything. Maybe I gave the pole a little love tap, because it’s too close. I’m not paying for anything.”

Love tap?

I bent down and stared at the wooden beam and wires that were now exposed.

He must have really loved that pillar.

Ps- He still swears that he never hit it.

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Submitted by Anonymous…

I have a current resident who's wife was backing out of her garage the other day and she didn't notice that she had hit the button on the remote so, like it happens all too often, she backed into the door causing damage.

This is nothing new - it happens all the time.

I talked with her and her husband about getting the door repaired letting them know that according to our garage guy it's actually cheaper to replace the entire door then just the two bottom panels she destroyed. My garage guy bent the panels back as best he could so the door would work for now.

After going through all the normal paperwork to submit it through our corporate insurance and scheduling to have the door replaced the husband calls me up and tells me he does not see why the entire door needs to be replaced - only the bottom two panels are damaged. I explained to him that it was cheaper to replace the entire door and I was trying to save him some money.

He went on to state that other doors around the property are also dented and he didn't see why he had to pay for this one if they didn't have to pay for theirs.

I just explained that the door was getting replaced - if he had an issue with that he could take it up with his insurance company.

The real kicker is that this guy is a State Trooper! Are they not supposed to enforce the laws?

That's like going to an accident seen and telling the offending driver "well, the guy you hit - his car was already dented so you shouldn't have to pay for the damage"

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I got a call that someone had been hit in the parking lot. 

It was a human this time.

The tenant who had been hit was visibly shaken, not that I blame her, and her boyfriend had his arm protectively wrapped around her. 

She didn't appear to have any physical damage.

The driver was more shaken that she was, not that I blame him, it's gotta freak you out when a human rolls across your windshield. 

After the initial shock wore off, everyone started getting mad. 

The driver was mad at the girl for hitting his car. 

The girl was mad at the driver for hitting her. 

The gathering of tenants were mad at me because the six speed bumps, ten posted Speed Limit signs and one SLOW DOWN sign were now not sufficient. 

I needed to do more. 

What more could I really do?

Well, aside from standing in the parking lot with a yellow vest, stop sign and whistle directing traffic. 

Although, I'm certain I would just get run over anyways. 

(it should be noted that the girl getting hit by a car drew a smaller crowd than the cat)

The cops came and took a report. 

Everyone was going to sue everyone and that's just how I left it. 

Luckily, there was a security camera.

The driver was going rather slow. 

I know this because there were people walking past him much faster than he was driving. 

He was looking at his phone though. 

The girl got out of her car, took out her phone and began looking down at the screen. 

She walked out into the parking lot and was then hit by the car.

When it hit her, she almost jumped up and sat on the hood, holding on to her phone the entire time 

It was far less dramatic than it had been played out to be. 

I said, let's call it a wash.